Self-Love – Page 2 – ITJUSTGOTRENO

The Power of Words, & How Reframing Your Language Will Change Your Life FOREVER

Posted on September 22, 2014April 12, 2020 by itjustgotreno

“I can’t” vs. “How can I”

“I won’t” vs. “I’m choosing not to”

“I don’t know” vs. “I’m seeking an answer/solution”

“Why is this happening to me” vs. “How is this happening for me,” or “What can I learn from this,” and “How can I use this?”

The power of words is absolutely amazing! The divinely- eloquent Maya Angelou best describes the power of words:

“Words are things. You must be careful, careful about calling people out of their names, using racial pejoratives and sexual pejoratives and all that ignorance. Don’t do that. Some day we’ll be able to measure the power of words. I think they are things. They get on the walls. They get in your wallpaper. They get in your rugs, in your upholstery, and your clothes, and finally in to you.” – Maya Angelou

Think about it… A single word or combination of words has the power to completely change the way a person feels, thinks, or functions. Furthermore, a person’s perception of words can both help and hinder. The word “can’t” has the power to keep a person “stuck”, and to cripple a person through to their insides.

The words “I don’t know” have the power to defeat a person dead in their steps, unless they follow with an intention such as “but, I’m looking for an answer.” The words “Why is this happening to me” can completely dis-empower a person and INSTANTLY transform them into a victim. An empowering re-frame could look something like “I’m not sure why this is happening to me, but I’m open to discovering how I can use it.”

With the same unyielding force, words also have the power to deliver you to a place of rapture, of resilience, of Divinity.

“How can I” cracks your mind right open to let delicious and Divine wisdom pour into that beautiful brain of yours.

“I’m choosing not to” puts you (consciously) behind the wheel of your decisions, and there’s really no better place to be.

“I’m seeking an answer” sweeps you off your feet and takes you on an enlightening and expansive adventure.

“How is this happening for me, and what can I learn from this” takes you from fear to “fuck it, let’s do something beautiful with this,” and doesn’t that sound so much better than the more dis-empowering version.

Time to put your ass where you heart is…

In the comments below, I CHALLENGE YOU to share an experience where re-framing your language transformed your view, AND I’d love for you to share what word(s) you replaced and how they created a shift. Remember, your feedback is valued and may serve others, and your courage gives others permission to be courageous as well.

If this post was of value to you, I invite you to click below and share it with those who you think would receive its depth and deliciousness.

With Love & Light,

Take. It. Back. – Boundaries, R-E-S-P-E-C-T, and How To Set ‘Em & Get ‘Em

Posted on September 7, 2014April 12, 2020 by itjustgotreno

I have this friend – we’ll call him John – and John struggles with boundaries. John’s favourite lines are “it’s all good”, “no worries”, and “it’s not an issue”. John’s the kinda guy who has chosen to accept the short end of the stick for a good portion of his young-adulthood/adulthood, and has suffered for it as a result – low/no-paying gigs, unpaid intern ships from hell, manipulative relationships, lacking or non-existent boundaries, etc.

To be clear, John isn’t a victim, John is a creator. You see, John has set the standard for his life, and by not respecting what he desires and requires, John has created a less-than-desired-and-required lifestyle for himself – he knows this.

You’re probably thinking “But how is this his fault, John has simply been screwed too many times,” and you’re right, but it’s important to recognize that John made the decision to accept the low/no-paying gigs, the unpaid internships from hell, the manipulative relationships, and the limitless boundaries, therefore; John has set the standard for what he desires and requires, and his environment reflects that.

Boundaries are a must, and, if ignored, a life of dissatisfaction will likely be the result. Set those boundaries John – set ’em strong, set ’em straight, set ’em clear, and watch satisfaction and respect pour into your life like a tropical monsoon.

You see, boundaries act as a sort of fence which we are to place around our open hearts. In order for you to create strong boundaries, you must create clarity around what it is that you believe you deserve, what it is you believe you are worthy of, and the non-negotiable things that you will invite onto the other side of that fence; the stronger and more clear your beliefs around what you deserve and what you are worthy of are, the stronger your fence. The more clear you are about the things you will not invite onto the other side of that fence, the easier it will be to see them coming, and turn them away: “No thank you; return to sender.”

Respect is earned. Some believe that fear equates to respect, but I believe that respect is earned and born as a result of love, trust, and wisdom; if you embody these attributes, you will receive deep admiration. The way to achieve respect is to practice love, share wisdom, and build trust with those you come in contact with. Listen, engage, connect, contribute, and serve; these are some of the easiest ways to earn respect from those around you.

Now for the fun part! A practice for defining your boundaries and inviting respect.

Start by creating a “I Am Worthy Of/I Deserve List”, take a deep breath, connect with your inner child, and love it by writing a list of all the things it is worthy of (love, respect, clean drinking water, food, clothing, happiness, abundance, etc). Then, below that list, create a “Return To Sender” list, and write down all of the non-negotiable things you will not invite or accept in your life. Finally, take that list and put it somewhere where you can see it regularly and refer to it. Eventually, this list will become a part of your daily practice, and you may find that you need it less and less.

Feels good when it’s in writing doesn’t it!?

If this has served you in some way, and/or you feel you know someone who it would help on their journey, I invite you to share it with them – they’ll thank you for it.

With Candour, Truth, and Love,

When It Rains, It Pours – How To Escape The Negative, Attract The Positive, & Flourish

Posted on September 7, 2014April 12, 2020 by itjustgotreno

“When it rains, it pours.” – Ain’t that the truth.

Not sure who coined the phrase, but there’s significant depth and truth to this statement.

It seems the day you sleep in ends up being the day that you’re forced to take a cold shower, you burn your breakfast, you spill coffee on your shirt, you end up stuck in traffic, you workload feels overwhelming, you find people to be increasingly irritating, and you feel like you can’t seem to catch a break.

On the flip side.

It seems the day you intentionally wake-up happy is also the day you decide to fit a morning workout into your schedule, you have a healthy breakfast, you meditate, you take a more scenic route to work, you can’t seem to stop smiling and humming your favourite tune, you score a big account/client, you find opportunities falling into your lap, you feel in-flow with life, and you’ve made best friends with gratitude and abundance.

One of life’s fundamental truths is that the energy you create and exert into the environment is the energy that you will receive. Some call it Karma, others make reference to The Law of Attraction, and Newton’s Third Law of Motion. Simply put; what goes around comes around, and what you put out into the Universe, you get back.

Take this principle and apply it to the aforementioned scenarios, and it truly does pour when it rains, but it’s all about perspective.

Are you singing in the rain, or sulking in the storm?

It’s not by chance that good things seem to happen all at once, as do bad things. And, if you’re someone who believes there’s something to this whole Karma/Law of Attraction/Law of Motion business, then you know that you attract what you exude. What I’ve come to discover, and I believe this is true for many of you, is that when I make a decision to catch a ride on a negative thought or scenario, its friends seem to follow (kinda like when you pluck a grey hair). The same is true for positive thoughts and scenarios.

Spiritual peeps call the result of this phenomenon “manifestation”; meaning your thoughts create your reality. I refer to it by its many titles. Potato Po-tat-o, tomato to-mat-o; the proof is in the pudding.

Recognizing and accepting where you’re at is one thing, but choosing to dwell in that space and that energy for an extended period of time is simply an invitation to receive more of that same energy. Recognizing, honouring, accepting and making a conscious decision around how you wish to move forward (in a productive and proactive manner) gives you the power, and who doesn’t like empowerment.

So! The good stuff. Ready to escape “the suck” and manifest good luck!? Here are some tips on how to make it happen captain:

When you feel yourself slipping into a negative space and mindset, PAUSE, take a deep breath (or a few), acknowledge the thought and/or the place you’re in (don’t ignore it; what you resist persists).
Ask yourself who is having the thoughts. Get this… you’re not your thoughts; they’re clouds passing in the wind.
Make a conscious decision (aloud if you’re feeling bold) not to dwell in that place or take a ride with those negative thoughts (NO THANK YOU!).
Invite more positivity and gratitude into your head and heart. One of my favourite things to do is express the many things I’m grateful for and the things I have to look forward to, in writing or aloud. Oprah helps too.
Remember your thoughts influence your feelings, your feelings influence your actions, and your actions create your reality. YOU ARE THE CREATOR. Own it. Take it back.
If all else fails, crank the tunes to your favourite song, and drop that shit like a hot potato! Who doesn’t love a good solo danceparty. WOOP WOOP!
Remember, this is an exercise and a practice, so you must keep at it.

With Love, Light, and Truth,