“I can’t” vs. “How can I”
“I won’t” vs. “I’m choosing not to”
“I don’t know” vs. “I’m seeking an answer/solution”
“Why is this happening to me” vs. “How is this happening for me,” or “What can I learn from this,” and “How can I use this?”
The power of words is absolutely amazing! The divinely- eloquent Maya Angelou best describes the power of words:
“Words are things. You must be careful, careful about calling people out of their names, using racial pejoratives and sexual pejoratives and all that ignorance. Don’t do that. Some day we’ll be able to measure the power of words. I think they are things. They get on the walls. They get in your wallpaper. They get in your rugs, in your upholstery, and your clothes, and finally in to you.” – Maya Angelou
Think about it… A single word or combination of words has the power to completely change the way a person feels, thinks, or functions. Furthermore, a person’s perception of words can both help and hinder. The word “can’t” has the power to keep a person “stuck”, and to cripple a person through to their insides.
The words “I don’t know” have the power to defeat a person dead in their steps, unless they follow with an intention such as “but, I’m looking for an answer.” The words “Why is this happening to me” can completely dis-empower a person and INSTANTLY transform them into a victim. An empowering re-frame could look something like “I’m not sure why this is happening to me, but I’m open to discovering how I can use it.”
With the same unyielding force, words also have the power to deliver you to a place of rapture, of resilience, of Divinity.
“How can I” cracks your mind right open to let delicious and Divine wisdom pour into that beautiful brain of yours.
“I’m choosing not to” puts you (consciously) behind the wheel of your decisions, and there’s really no better place to be.
“I’m seeking an answer” sweeps you off your feet and takes you on an enlightening and expansive adventure.
“How is this happening for me, and what can I learn from this” takes you from fear to “fuck it, let’s do something beautiful with this,” and doesn’t that sound so much better than the more dis-empowering version.
Time to put your ass where you heart is…
In the comments below, I CHALLENGE YOU to share an experience where re-framing your language transformed your view, AND I’d love for you to share what word(s) you replaced and how they created a shift. Remember, your feedback is valued and may serve others, and your courage gives others permission to be courageous as well.
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With Love & Light,
